By: Smooth Hoperator (A Toast) –
Young Einstein is set in 1905 in Tasmania and stars producer Yahoo Serious as the main character, Albert Einstein, the beautiful Odile Le Clezio as Marie Curie, and Einstein’s scientific cynic and envious douchebag “Preston Preston” is played by John Howard.
Albert’s life consists of helping out on the family’s apple orchard, playing violin, and deriving formulas from taking blunt force trauma to the head. After Albert discloses to his father (Peewee Wilson) that he’s a pacifist who aspires to be a scientist, his father shows Albert the family tradition of brewing beer in a shack no larger than a portable toilet.
I ain’t shittin’ you.
His father goes on to explain that the main problem with brewing beer is that mankind has never succeeded in putting bubbles in beer. After copious amounts of alcohol and a few minutes by a bonfire, Albert hypothesizes splitting the nucleus of a beer atom into two fragments to create foam. What better way to accomplish this then by using none other than a chisel? One mushroom cloud later and voila! E=MC^2 is created.
First, on the splitting of the beer molecule to create foam: I can think of no better invention in a movie that suits Movieboozer so well. Among inventing the foamy concoction, Albert invents surfing and rock and roll. Can I get a ‘fuck yeah’?
The foam thickens as Albert’s recipe falls into the hands of charlatan Preston; who’s acting throughout the movie is spot-on for his bag of douche character. Shortly thereafter, Albert gets thrown into the Lunatic Asylum—ironically with a bunch of other mad scientists who get headaches trying to comprehend Albert’s theories. Marie Curie, who has been wooed by Albert’s intelligence, rushes to free him from the lunatic asylum and hilarity ensues.
Throughout the movie there is 80s tunes and random funny background music often played by Einstein himself, it is the same that you find in the slapstick-type comedy from Yahoo Serious (and similar to most 80s and early 90s flicks). The cinematography also has standard cheesy 80s visual effects. From the electric violin to inventing rock in roll by watching kids play hopscotch, this movie deserves recognition as a late 80’s comedy classic.
Classic 80s movies really don’t get much better than this; it’s too bad that digitally manipulating videos and better CGI came in the early 90s. The cheesy scenes could have only been done by Yahoo Serious. Not even Gene Wilder and Chevy Chase’s love child could accomplish this feat. Kudos, Yahoo.
I was just playing, guys.
Bonus Drinking Game
Take a Drink: every time a character in the movie refers to E=MC^2 as “EMMCK”
Take a Drink: every time Albert bites into an apple.
Take a Sip: every time Albert starts to hypothesize or answers a physics question.
Take a Shot: every time Albert plays the violin.