Epic (2013)

Epic (2013)
Epic (2013) DVD / Blu-ray

By: Joel Olivo (Five Beers) –

While attempting to reconnect with her estranged father, M.K. gets transported into a world where a battle rages for the life of the forest.

A Toast

The voice acting in this film really enhanced the overall presentation. Beyonce Knowles, Colin Farrell, and Josh Hutcherson rounded out a pretty stellar cast. I found the art design to be amazing. All the little nuances of the forest really made the world vibrant.

Beer Two

A little girl is shrunk in her dad’s back yard, with an eccentric scientist father?…Which movie am I watching here?


“I didn’t shrink the kids, nature did! I swear!”

Beer Three

This beer goes to the the sidekick. Every children’s romp has a sidekick, a loveable goof who occasionally comes through in the clutch. This slot was filled by two slugs… Or a slug and a snail, rather, played by Aziz Ansari and Chris O’Dowd. These slithering gastropods attempt to mitigate the encroaching darkness with wit, and they fail. I would have preferred the silent cocaroach from Wall-E.

beer 2

“Just Look For The Slime!”

Beer Four

This beer was for the lesson. While these feature films tend to cover alot of moral/ life lessons, the one that stood out for me the most was loss. Without giving to much away, loss does occur. Watching these characters deal with loss felt glazed over. It paled in comparison to watching Carl Fredricksen’s life unfold in the opening sequence of UP.

beer 3

“Had me bawling Like a 7 year old.”

Beer Five

The adult factor. Let’s face it, kids aren’t the ones shelling out 12 bucks a ticket and a week’s paycheck on snacks to keep the little walking boogers happy. The adults need something, too. What really sets a good animated film apart from a great animated film is the adult factor. Everyone in that theatre should enjoy the picture. Epic, while a well paced children’s movie, lost its adult audience with its weak storytelling.



Epic will provide a fun-filled romp for all the walking boogers in your life; the only downside is you will probably have to go with them.  Less exciting than a 64 man-raid.


Drinking Game

Take a Drink: every time the dad reminds you of Wayne Szalinski.

Take a Drink: every time you find yourself thinking of a better kids movie.

Do a Shot: Every time someone talks about slime.

About Joel Olivo

Movieboozer is a humor website and drinking games are intended for entertainment purposes only, please drink responsibly.


  1. Henry J. Fromage

    Good review- looks like I’ll skip this one (and judging by the uncharacteristic drop in its second week box office total, so are most folks).

  2. Beyonce’s voice acting in this movie was horrendous. Every line sounded like it came from from a kid’s animated B-movie from the 70’s.

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