Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani (2013)

posterBy: Aparnna Hajirnis (Six Pack) –
How many beers do you recommend for this movie?
1 Beer! A Toast! Great Movie!2 Beers! Good Movie!3 Beers! Okay Movie!4 Beers! Mediocre Movie!5 Beers! Awful Movie!6-Pack! Bad movie! Do not be Sober!

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Nerd Girl. Playboy Boy. They take a life-altering trip. Name this film. A boy and a girl take a life-altering holiday together. Deepika is shown to be a mousy, studious, bespectacled girl named Naina Talwar. She doesn’t  smoke and has never been kissed. Ranbir  portrays Bunny- a reckless charmer who flirts outrageously and is a wanderlust at heart. She’s studying to be a doctor while he wants to be a videographer (photo journalist, TV host) but he wants to travel the world. They are accompanied by two of their school friends, including Kalki Koechlin as Aditi, who’s a tomboy but later on turns into a poster girl for Gossip Girl. Shes also secretly in love with Aditya Roy Kapoor who plays the role of Avi, who’s also a Casanova and spends time drinking and gambling. Bunny gets an offer from a university abroad and leaves behind a heartbroken Naina, only to meet her 8 years later at Aditi’s wedding to a rich guy and see her transformation from a nerd to a bombshell.

ranbir and deepika

“Hahahaha this film is going to be such a huge flop”

A Toast

The only toast in this movie is to Deepika Padukone’s costumes and the peppy dance number “Balam Pichkari”.

Beer Two

This is the basic premise of the story stringed along by a number of songs. Without the songs the movie is an juvenile attempt at film-making. The songs also seem to appear out of the nowhere and have very little correlation with the scenes preceding them. The much overhyped item song number of Madhuri Dixit, “Ghaagra”, appears in the first five minutes of the film and has no background or any other connection with the rest of the movie. Also, it is to be noted Madhuri’s ghaghra looks more like a skirt than a ghaghra, notwistanding the song’s title.

Beer Three

The first half of the movie sets up a premise of how Bunny is serious about his career and would do anything to achieve success and travel the world. Deepika is equally ambitious but her dreams seem to take a backseat on this impromptu *world tour*. Their parents do not appear for the rest of the film. Except for in the second half during flashbacks.

deepika padukone

“Sigh! I need some serious acting lessons.”

Karan Johar seems to have done a lot of cost-cutting by making sure seasoned theatre artists such as Tanvi Azmi and Farooque Shaikh do not get more than 10 minutes of screen space. Not to forget as usual with Karan Johar’s films, this one has gay jokes too, only to be pointed at Kalki Koechlin.

Beer Four

The second half makes even little sense than the first half  and it takes a time leap of 8 years in the future. Why would Deepika wear a miniskirt in a sub-zero climate? Why would you play holi and get drenched in water in a sub-zero temperature state?

Spoiler, kind of

And of course, Ranbir, who’s so ambitious, decides to give up his career plans of becoming a “travel show host” to settle down as he realizes his love for Deepika towards the end. (As in every Hindi movie, you have to realize your mistake in the end).

Beer Five

As for the technical aspects, Director Ayan Mukherji, famous for his movie Wake Up Sid, was totally disastrous in this film.  I was wondering if there was any authentic screenplay?  This movie seems like a mashup of  Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge + Jab We Met + Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, etc. etc. and all of the other  Karan Johar movies. There are more songs than Kalki Koechlin’s dialogues and it seems pretty insulting to musicals if I was to call this one.

Beer Six

The movie is fast moving in the first half. The second half drags along for a long time around the premise of Kalki’s wedding. The movie in all stretches on for a good 3 hours. Kalki’s character in the first half is that of a tomboy and in the second half she could become the poster girl for a fashion magazine or a cosmetics brand and decides to settle down with a man in a typical Big Fat Indian Wedding . So much for Feminism!

Verdict

Six Pack

Horrible movie.  Do not watch.  Six beers.

 

Drinking Game

Take a Drink: when Ranbir Kapoor says “mujhe zindagi se raftar chahiye” (“I want speed from life”)

Do a Shot: when Deepika Padukone says ‘ mujhe tumse pyaar ho jayega..fir se” (“I will fall in love with you… again”)

Do a Shot : when Ranbir Kapoor says ‘ tum buri nahi ho..bas mujhse alag ho” (“You are not bad, you are just different from me”)

Down a 32 oz: when Ranbir and Deepika make-out. Wow! They kissed like cousins.

About Aparnna Hajirnis

3 comments

  1. I was intrigued by this when it surprisingly broke into the top ten at the U.S. box office… sounds like I’m not missing much with it, though.

  2. Indian summer movies are an acquired taste,if want real substance as well,check these out:

    3 Idiots(This one broke into the top 10 as well)

    Rang de basanti

  3. I’ve heard great things about the former and even have a copy of it I need to get around to watching. The latter I’ll have to search out for sure.

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