By Julio De Francisco (Two Beers) –
The God of Thunder (from down under, Chris Hemsworth), Thor, is an arrogant and vain prince of Asgard. During his crowning ceremony as the new King, the Frost Giants infiltrate Odin’s Chamber to try and recover the source of their power. Thor, along with his brother and Asgard’s fiercest warriors, retaliate in the realm of the Frost Giants, bringing them to the brink of war. As punishment, his father, Odin, banishes him from Asgard until he proves his worthiness. Don’t worry; it only takes a couple of days.
This is how you fully imagine a world, btw
I was never into Thor as a child; I always thought his weapon (a hammer) was weak. Call it ignorance or a lack of imagination, but a sword seemed a whole lot mightier than a hammer. Not anymore. Mjölner, is pretty much a God in and of itself, capable of leveling mountains. When Thor possessed Mjölner, he could strike as firmly as he wanted, whatever his aim, and the hammer would never fail, and if he threw it at something, it would never miss and never fly so far from his hand that it would not find its way back, and when he wanted, it would be so small that it could be carried inside his tunic (Wikipedia: Mjölner). Just as it was described is exactly how you see it performed. It was… amazing. Indeed, the film’s interpretation of Asgard and the Gods, their power, and the melding of magic and science as one really earned this first beer.
Mario, my true childhood hero, had it right all along.
One of the things that I was really impressed by was the CGI and how it enhanced the world in Thor as opposed to being a distraction. The Bridge for example that would link Asgard to another realm would light up as it was stepped on in an array of colors that was beautiful and fantastic, and also the warping tunnel from one realm to the next was done as brilliantly and exciting as one could imagine while traveling through a ‘worm hole’ of sorts. The Frost Giants fight scene also impressed me, and the way they came running at Thor and his warriors, Zena, Jackie Chan, Robin Hood, and a Gimli (ala Lord of the Rings) look-alike. I was able to enjoy the battles without once thinking, “Soo fake.” Actually, I was totally into it.
Xena/Sif requested her own headshot.
I also loved Idris Elba (‘Stringer’ of The Wire) as Heimdall. He’s the guy who guards the portal at the end of the bridge. Unfortunately, as powerful and amazing as this guy is set up, we see him in maybe 10-20 seconds of actual battle. The rest of the time it’s just his stare that leaves him looking like a badass. Even so, that still doesn’t take away from how badass his character was. You were waiting for him to make a move the entire time, but he was as calm as any badass should be.
His stare means business.
The way Thor carried his arrogance in our realm (Earth) I found particularly amusing. Thor, not knowing what realm he was in, was treating everyone like they were his servants and not reacting to vehicles coming his way. He would walk down the street as if he were that immortal being. I laughed mighty hard when he finished a coffee, smashed it on the ground, and asked for another. Clearly, we had our American customs versus what he’s used to and I thought this clash between two cultures (the one of the Gods and that of Earth) was great.
What are these things you call cars?
Who was that guy with the bow & arrow and why did they give him so much screen time? In the scene where Thor is trying to recover his Hammer there is a man with a Bow who is waiting for the command of his superior to shoot Thor. I couldn’t help but notice that they had given him a lot of on screen time and then did nothing with him. Then there was a mud wrestling fight between Thor and a security officer the size of a tank. Even though the guy had a bullet proof vest on, Thor was able to punch him in the gut/chest and take the guy down. Thor, mind you, had human powers, not his God power. Of all the CGI scenes that I saw this one was probably the least believable.
Not seen, but forgotten, is the man pointing an arrow at Thor’s head.
Just a couple of final thoughts… Anthony Hopkins character, Odin, was pretty awesome, but I think his strapless eye patch in this movie is going to cause a strapless eye patch movement. Call me old fashioned, but I like it pirate-style. Worse, people will spray paint their eye patches gold and soon we’ll have a bunch of Odin wannabes all the place. Also, Natalie Portman next to Chris Hemsworth, didn’t seem like a likely pairing. He would split her in half with his ‘hammer.’ Also, is anyone else tired of the “I’m bored” Kat Dennings character? She plays the part well, but she has about as much range as Michelle Rodriguez and her tough girl roles. If anyone should ever have a role for an apathetic woman who’s easy on the eyes and can fill a Double “D” bra, Kat Dennings is first choice.
Is he seeing what I’m seeing?
Bonus Drinking Game
Take a drink: whenever Thor gets hit by a car.
Take a drink: whenever Thor says something arrogant.
Take a drink: whenever Thor barks a command.
Take a drink: whenever Mjölner is said.
Chug a beer: when Thor chugs a beer.