By: Henry J. Fromage (Four Beers) –
After the lame trailers and lukewarm critical response, I didn’t think I’d get around to watching this one. Then Quentin Tarantino threw it in as an honorable mention on his Best of 2010 list. He might not be the final arbiter on all things cool, but if there was an election for one he’d probably be a candidate.
Cameron Diaz plays a woman who crosses paths with a mysterious man in an airport, which turns out to be Tom Cruise in fullMission: Impossible mode. She gets tangled up in his convoluted escape from shady government agents as he tries to protect a world-changing invention.
I suspect the real reason Tarantino liked this so much is the fact that it has some of the best action sequences of the year. Don’t think too hard about the plot holes, coincidences, and arbitrary changing of the rules. Just pop open a beer and enjoy all the shit blowin’ up.
Who needs Oscars when you’ve got this?
I do have to assign a beer to the music, though, which has a new-agey jazz feel to it that couldn’t possibly go worse with karate chops and high-speed pursuits.
Ditto the accents the actors use. The villain played by Peter Saarsgard has one somewhere between Australian and Texan, which I can only assume he did on a bet. Diaz’s isn’t as off-putting, but the Boston Irish thing just doesn’t fit her.
I thought we already had that one figured out
I know I told you to ignore the script earlier, but at a certain point the ridiculous dialogue gets a bit annoying. Clichés rain down like the crazy out of Charlie Sheen’s mouth and it’s altogether less clever than it thinks it is.
Pop a bag of microwave popcorn and flip the brain switch. There are worse ways to waste a few hours.
Bonus Drinking Game
Take a drink: each time Tom Cruise smirks and delivers a cliché
Take a drink: whenever someone is slipped a roofie
Drink a shot: when Paul Dano does a hobo impersonation