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Green Lantern (2011)

The Green Lantern (2011)

The Green Lantern (2011) DVD / Blu-Ray

By: Julio De Francisco (Four Beers) -
How many beers do you recommend for this movie?
1 Beer! A Toast! Great Movie!2 Beers! Good Movie!3 Beers! Okay Movie!4 Beers! Mediocre Movie!5 Beers! Awful Movie!6-Pack! Bad movie! Do not be Sober!

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Harold “Hal” Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) is a test pilot who is the first human to be chosen to become a Green Lantern, a member of an intergalactic peace keeping organization powered by green light, replacing Abin Sur (Temuera Morrison, aka Boba Fett from Star Wars) who is gravely injured while battling the color yellow which apparently shoots “Fear Bullets” from its mouth!

Seriously, who wouldn’t shit themselves in this situation?

A Toast

Finally, a superhero’s mask doesn’t fool anyone, and to that I raise my first glass.  The scene is when Carol Ferris (Blake Lively) meets The Green Lantern on her balcony.  Hal speaks in a low voice, ala Christian Bale’s Batman, and tries to pass himself as a mysterious hero.  After a moment of hesitation Carol realizes Hal is the Green Lantern, citing that it was obvious who it is and that a mask covering only the cheekbones wasn’t going to disguise or fool anyone. If there was anything this movie got right, it was this.  All other so-called achievements are debatable.

What are the three differences between the left and right photo?

Beer Two

While comic book geeks and folks over the age of 40 were well versed on The Green Lantern and its lore, the majority us oblivious action movie fiends won’t keep up with the pace of the film and all the GL references.  By the end of the movie I was thinking that maybe it was going on too long, because a lot was happening in the 105-minute run-time.  As quickly as a green orb of light abducts him, he has the ring and a lantern that teaches him the saying to call upon the power of the ring.

What the hell is going on?

Beer Three

The Green Lantern violated a physiological pet peeve of mine in movies, making audible noises and taking deep breaths of excitement in the vacuum of space.  Am I alone on this?  As much as I loved The Neverending Story, I couldn’t stand seeing Atreyu riding Falcor in space after the nothing destroyed Fantasia knowing off camera was a large fan gently blowing air at them.  The GL has a few of these scenes.

Jesus > Atreyu

Beer Four

Though it makes it easy for the non reading population of movie goers, I thought it was half-ass that the all the alien green lanterns spoke only English. Kilowog (Michael Clarke Duncan), for example, is from the planet Bolovax Vik, did not speak his own language?  What’s the story behind this?  I’m sure some comic book guy is going to come up with an explanation, but I thought it was pretty lame.

Verdict

 

 

 

For all the faults than Green Lantern suffers, it is likable after a few cold ones.  I actually had four drinks (three before the movie) and one during and I found that I really enjoyed this movie.  While things were kind of jumping front one thing to another, I found it fairly entertaining as Ryan Reynolds does deliver a number of funny scenes.

 

Bonus Drinking Game

Take a drink: anytime you hear the word “Fear” or “Afraid.”

Take a drink: anytime Hal Jordan’s eyes turn white.

Take a shot: whenever Dr. Hector Hammond reads a mind.

 

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About Salvador Garcia

One of the following statements is true about the author: Was a child prodigy in science and music. Was a beer pong champion three years in a row in his college dorm. Babysat by VHS tapes and watched movies rated G to R as a child.

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