Grabbers (2012)

grabbersposterBy: Henry J. Fromage (Four Beers) –
How many beers do you recommend for this movie?
1 Beer! A Toast! Great Movie!2 Beers! Good Movie!3 Beers! Okay Movie!4 Beers! Mediocre Movie!5 Beers! Awful Movie!6-Pack! Bad movie! Do not be Sober!

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I’m always down for a comedy with a hook, and as hooks go, Grabbers’s is a doozie.  I’ll skip straight to the plot synopsis.  A sleepy Irish island, where seemingly the only activity besides fishing is drinking, is attacked by fearsome, octopus-y* alien creatures over the course of a long weekend cut off from the mainland.

octopussy-maud

*No

A posse made up of a jaded alcoholic (Richard Coyle), his young female partner (Ruth Bradley), the town drunk, and a science-y dude look seriously overmatched until they discover the bloodsucking aliens’ one weakness- alcohol.  Bad move attacking Ireland, aliens.

4-pyramids-giza1

It’s like attacking Egypt if your weakness is sand and getting ripped off

A Toast

The only way to keep the aliens from “grabbing” you is by getting hilariously shitfaced.  If you think a website named Movieboozer isn’t going to get behind that concept, I have some genuine Egyptian artifacts to sell you.  The move really gets rolling when this discover is made, and the fight against the aliens begins.  This part is easily the funniest, elevating the film from a jovial, likable one to a pretty damn funny flick.

The acting is all over the place, but in a comedy that’s acceptable enough.  The central duo does a great job, though, and their chemistry is excellent.  Bradley in particular will hopefully get some higher-profile roles in the future.

Beer Two

One thing you’ll notice from the start is this film’s cheap production values.  Considering the amount of CG they have to use, the filmmakers stretch their budget pretty well, but that doesn’t explain why they chose to smear their lens with Vaseline for half of the flick.

Missing-Persons-Give

It’s like an 80s power ballad video

Beer Three

This is supposed to be a horror/comedy film, but there was minimal effort put into the horror half.  It’s like the screenwriters were running Word ’97, and Clippy pops up and says “It looks like you’re writing a horror film.  Would you like to use a template?”

Clippy

Die in a fire, Clippy

Beer Four

“Insert lame jump scare here.”

shutupclippy

Shut the fuck up, Clippy!

Verdict

4Beers

This film shoots for the comedy/horror balance of a Shaun of the Dead, and accomplishes about half of that.  It’s still a good afternoon-waster, and a fine drinking game movie.

 

Drinking Game

Take a Drink: whenever someone in the movie does

Take a Drink: for every jump scare (however feeble)

Take a Drink: every time someone gets… grabbed!

Do a Shot: Free Bar!

About Henry J. Fromage

Movieboozer is a humor website and drinking games are intended for entertainment purposes only, please drink responsibly.

4 comments

  1. Tales of a TV Addict

    I enjoyed this movie a lot! Kinda sad someone already wrote about it…best scene the guy from British Being Human getting tossed like a rag doll!

  2. Whenever someone in the movie does……. Are you guys retarded? Finish your sentence.

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