Colin Firth is a Busy Boy

By: Henry J. Fromage –

Steven Spielberg’s finally picked his next flick, and nope it’s not about Moses or Robopocalypses or perhaps Moses dismembering robots with his wicked staff skills, unfortunately perhaps.  Nope, instead he’ll be tackling the Bradley Cooper-produced and starring American Sniper, as the Coop’s committed to only starring in properly ‘merican movies from here on out (1.  American Bullshit is the only title I’ll accept for David O. Russell’s next.  2.  Oops, fuck you again, Jane Got a Gun).  The film is the true-life tale (and best-selling book) of Navy SEAL sniper Chris Kyle, who racked up the most confirmed kills in Iraq only to return home to a tragic end.


I.E. American Pie 5.  Pictured: Stiffler, Jim, That Guy Nobody Remembers, Oz

When Jane Got a Gun went off the rails, I thought the pairing of Michael Fassbender and producer/star Natalie Portman was one of its big losses.  Since Fassbender bailed first and Portman, financially tied into the project, couldn’t, it seemed like they may never.  Well, color me wrong on that, as the two will be playing no less than Lord and Lady MacBeth, in an adaptation by Australian up-and-coming director Justin Kurzel (Snowtown).  Apparently this film will be more “visceral” with “significant battle scenes.”  Sign me up.


Won’t be terribly hard to top

Because Woody Allen doesn’t stop working, ever, apparently, he’s already casting up his next film before his latest, Blue Jasmine, is even finished. There are no plot details as of yet, but it will take place in the south of France, and Colin Firth and Emma Stone will star, ostensibly as another nicely inappropriately aged Allen screen couple.


Better than Manhattan, I guess.

Firth has another, vastly different role lined up with The Secret Service, like Kick-Ass a Matthew Vaughn-directed adaptation of an edgy Mark Millar comic book.  He’ll play a James Bond-esque agent whose nephew Gary gets embroiled in his escapades.  He ends up training Gary himself in his secret agent ways, which is tough,


Because Gary is a raging D-bag.

Well, this week is Colin Firth news week apparently, probably due to Arthur Newman, besides the fact nobody cares about that movie.  Emily Blunt and he must have enjoyed making it though, as they’ll reunite in Murder Mystery with Charlize Theron and Adam Sandler of all people.  It is a comedy/thriller, following a honeymooning couple in Europe who get wrapped up in some spy hijinks, and will be directed by John Madden (The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel).


The best part of which was guessing who was gonna have the fatal heart attack

One controversial piece of news from last week was the chutzpah of Zach Braff taking to Kickstarter to fund his second directorial project.  He is worth around $22 million according to Forbes, so you would think he’d be able to shell out the $2 million he needs out of pocket, but honestly, I don’t see what the big deal is.  Nobody’s being forced to donate, and if the public at large didn’t want to support him, then they wouldn’t.  Well… it took about two days to meet his goal, probably due in no small part to the media making a big deal of things.  Wish I Was Here will star Braff as a very Zach Braff-y struggling actor prone to fantasy interludes and ends up stuck homeschooling two kids.


Stick with what works, I say

About Henry J. Fromage

Movieboozer is a humor website and drinking games are intended for entertainment purposes only, please drink responsibly.

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