Take a Drink: every time Deadpool breaks the Fourth Wall… but if you want to black out in the first 10 minutes…
Take a Drink: every time someone says, “Fuck”
Take a Drink: every time someone gets killed
Do a Shot: if you make it through the movie using those last two rules. Oh, and the obligatory Stan Lee cameo.
By: Kyle Daley (A Toast) –
He is a man who goes by many names. Some know him as the “Merc with the Mouth.” Others call him “The Regenerating Degenerate.” However, most tend to call him “A royal pain that won’t shut up.” I am talking about none other than Marvel Comics’ most popular rip off of DC Comics’ Deathstroke. A man known as Dea….
Aaaahhh!!!! Crap, Deadpool! You scared the shit out of me! What are you doing here and why?
Wait…why do you look all real and not like a drawing from a comic book now?
Ugh! I don’t NEED nor do I WANT you here right now!
Look, dude, I need to finish this review. Can you please just go somewhere else for a bit? We’ll get chimichangas later?
…Due to Marvel’s moronic selling of certain movie rights to Fox Studios, and the fact both companies hate each other, there may never be a Spider-Man/Deadpool team-up to hit theaters.
OH MY GOD…..
That actually worked! I better get this done before his healing-factor kicks in. Without further delay, this is Deadpool.
It’s a basic revenge plot. Wade Wilson becomes an unstoppable killing machine by being tricked into thinking some crazy science can cure his cancer. Then bad guys who turned him into said killer capture his girlfriend so he has to go save her. The plot is pretty standard, and the villains are fun at times, but don’t really stand out.
However, that is all made up due to the fact that Ryan Reynolds absolutely kills it as the Merc with the Mouth. He does nothing but talk and break the fourth wall while hacking bad guys to bits with blood and guts everywhere. Not all lines in this movie are funny, but there are more than enough pop culture references and in-jokes that land. And when they’re funny, they are downright hilarious. Almost as if he is channeling some more perverted version of his Van Wilder performance, Reynolds does nothing but spew one-liners that make you want to pay attention in fear of missing one of Deadpool’s trademark quips of hilarity.
The movie isn’t afraid to get serious either. The torture scenes are pretty intense, and despite that the bad guys in this film might not be the best, they do at least manage to make the audience feel like they are some kind of sick and demented group of mad scientists trying to take control of other humans. Also, the romance between Deadpool and Vanessa (Morena Baccarin) is strong enough to keep the plot line going and help put the viewer in Wade’s place when it comes to feeling the need to save her from harm.
Then comes the best part: the action. Oh. My. God! It’s full of enough flips, martial arts, gun play, sword brandishing, and gore to satisfy anyone’s inner psycho. The movie only has about 4-6 set pieces, but makes good use of them and the cinematography mixes well with the choreography of the fight scenes, leading to a non-stop action thrill ride. Oh, and did I mention the gore? The R-Rated earning gore?
Ugh, fine, Wade. I’m almost done.
This movie just might be the best comic to screen adaptation of a character I have ever seen. Yeah, the villains aren’t the most interesting and the plot is pretty standard, but that doesn’t really matter. Any Deadpool fanboy will tell you the best part of any story involving the character isn’t really the plot, it’s the way he interacts with the other people around him. Ryan Reynolds gives what is without a doubt the best performance I have witnessed of his. Some reviews have called this movie “a game changer” as far as superhero movies are concerned, and I’m inclined to agree. I’m really hoping that Deadpool will help usher in a new era of R-Rated comic book movies. Something for the adult audience. Finally, this movie is a must see for anyone who is a fan of Deadpool.
There, Wilson, was that good enough for you?
I’m assuming “Deadpool style” doesn’t involve just a thank you card and a free copy of the Blu-ray when it comes out.
…You’ll have to excuse me, Deadpool. I left a…food in the oven. (Go see the movie folks, but avoid the actual Deadpool at all costs. He’s more annoying than Wolverine lets on).