Atlas Shrugged: Part III: Who is John Galt? (2014)

Drinking Game

Take a Drink: any time John Galt’s name is referenced

Take a Drink: any time stock footage is used

Drink a Shot: whenever Liberals are depicted doing criminally stupid things (We get it, movie).

Community Review

How many beers do you recommend for this movie?
1 Beer! A Toast! Great Movie!2 Beers! Good Movie!3 Beers! Okay Movie!4 Beers! Mediocre Movie!5 Beers! Awful Movie!6-Pack! Bad movie! Do not be Sober!

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Movie Review

By: Oberst Von Berauscht (Six Pack) –

In the near future the oppressive U.S. government takes advantage of minorities; using their services for the bettering of the American people.  These tired, huddled masses can do nothing to stop the onslaught of exploitation. Dagny Taggart is a member of this minority group; the super rich. She is owner of the world’s biggest railway concern, in a future where lack of resources have made railroads the chief mode of travel for most individuals.  Taggart has become obsessed with the numerous disappearances of fellow rich people, and sets out to find them.  When Atlas Shrugged III takes place, Dagny has just crashed her airplane while struggling to find the illusive John Galt, a man who she believes is responsible for the disappearances.  Galt has plans for the world’s “producers”, and Dagny wants to know what they are.

Scrooge
Galt, pictured above.

A Toast

The concept of rational selfishness was blown totally out of the water after the first two Atlas Shrugged films disappeared into the ether of box office failure. Yet despite the market’s rejection of the first two films, producer John Aglialoro knew better.  America needed to fully appreciate and understand Ayn Rand’s Objectivist philosophy.  And so, with a need for money far exceeding the ability of the free market to provide it, he turned to Kickstarter.com to beg.

Consider these Shenanigans frowned upon...
Consider these shenanigans frowned upon…

Beer Two

I find it fascinating that the entire principle cast (aside from a handful of tertiary characters) has turned over with each new entry in this series.  The result this provides for the narrative is confusing to say the least, forcing the screenwriters to set up the characters of the movie over and over again, with clunky dialogue or corny freeze-frame subtitles.

Beer Three

the Result of this actor-turnover is a cast of D-squad day-players who seem totally uncomfortable with their characters and the material they are given to read.  I say “read” because to call the performances in this film “Acting” would be an insult to the art.  I don’t totally blame the performers for their failure to convey emotion, but rather the sterile screenplay that uses Rand’s aging narrative like a dog would a chew-toy.

Beer Four

The director’s sole dramatic credit on IMDB is a 1996 episode of Nash Bridges.  I haven’t seen that episode, but it’s obvious that he’s out of practice.  This begs the question: “What Happened?”.  What’d he do for the last 18 years, and why hasn’t he been working?

Did he piss in Cheech's cereal?
Did he piss in Cheech’s cereal?

Of course, it doesn’t help that the past two films in the franchise gave him almost nothing to work with, but those were at least films that could hold up as 90s made-for-TV movies.  This film features the nuance and style of Tommy Wiseau’s The Room, but without the charm.

the-room_320
Johnny’s hard work wasn’t appreciated either.

Beer Five

At least a solid third of the film has to be stock footage with droning narration in place of actual exposition.  Sometimes the narration doesn’t have anything to do with the events happening in the story.  Pointless background info is often provided, which may have been interesting in a novel, but serves only as filler in a movie.

Ed Wood used stock footage with more purpose.
Ed Wood used stock footage with more purpose.

Beer Six

This final beer goes not just to Atlas Shrugged III, but to the entire film series, for finally being over. Four years of my life have elapsed since the first film, and now I can finally move on to better things… isn’t The Fountainhead about due for a remake?

Verdict

The free market has spoken…

Six Pack

About Oberst von Berauscht

Oberst Von Berauscht once retained the services of a Gypsy to imbue in him the ability to accurately describe the artistic qualities of a film up to seven decimal points. To maintain this unique skill, he must feast on the blood of a virgin every Harvest Moon, or failing that (and he usually does), he can also make a dog do that thing they do where they twist their heads slightly (you know, when they're confused about something) at least a few times a week. I've gotten way off track here... The point is, Oberst is one of the website's founders, so... yeah

One comment

  1. Take a sip everytime John Galt is mentioned. RIP.

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