Hillary’s America: The Secret History of the Democratic Party (2016) Movie Review

By: Henry J. Fromage (Six Pack) –

You know the drill.  Dinesh D’Souza is the Right’s answer to Michael Moore, but entirely bereft of any what talent, humor, integrity or reasoning skills Moore has.

To be honest, this isn’t exactly an insurmountable bar to vault.

What D’Souza did was make an explicitly nonsensical takedown of Hillary Clinton and the history of the Democratic Party which earned the twin distinctions of worst reviewed film of the year and best grossing documentary of last year.  Perhaps we all should have seen this Trump thing coming more definitively.

A Toast

Well, these things are getting slicker and slicker production values.  I don’t know how, but this guy could make an actual fiction film that would look like a pro did it.  I mean, I guess he did make an actual fiction film, but you know what I mean.

Casting-wise, Hillary sure looks like a young Hillary.  Bill… looks like a Teen Wolf.  I have no idea why.

Beer Two

Dinesh D’Souza did not go to jail.  Yes, he was convicted of a crime, not in the hilariously cheap recreation of his trial that he tries to pass off as real, but he was convicted of abusing campaign finance rules, which he very much did, and also, oh yeah, entered a guilty plea for.

But he did not actually go to jail, especially not this high school gymnasium one that apparently can be entered and excited through a single metal detector and where convicted murders/insurance scammers via wholesale murder just chill in their jeans and strike up self-incriminating conversations with the white collar criminals they commingle with.

Dinesh D’Souza was at a halfway house for the entirety of his 8 month sentence, like the pussy bitch he is.  Sending him to jail would be a death sentence, like those little birds that so freeze up in fright at the sight of a real predator that their tiny hearts stop.

If he’s had an entire conversation with a criminal or Mexican in his whole life, I’ll eat anybody’s hat.

Beer Three

The entire premise of this film operates in complete ignorance of how, yes, the Democrats were the racist party but Nixon aggressively courted those voters and got elected in much the same way as Donald Trump- by appealing to the silent majority that Democrat Lyndon B. Johnson helped alienate by signing the Civil Rights Act.  There’s no subtleties here, no background, no analysis.  Just cherry-picking.

Beer Four

Like Michael Moore, D’Souza puts himself in front of the camera a lot more in this one… not a good call.  This is becoming a documentary issue in general; these things are not supposed to be op-eds, but D’Souza in particular is an incredibly uncharismatic and transparently phony screen presence.

Beer Five

The first question D’Souza asks of the one security guard next to the metal detector/maximum security prison entrance is, “But is this place dangerous?” followed directly by hulking black man coming through the metal detector to, start serving his sentence I guess?  That shrill dog whistle is coupled with lines like “Lincoln understood slavery was a form of theft.”  You, sir, are the racist.

This is first page Image Search stuff now, and essentially what D’Souza put on screen.  God bless or curse America, whichever it deserves more.

Beer Six

Where did they find all of these minority actors willing to be a part of this charade?  Especially the mind-rotting double-whammy of a musical finale, followed by a stinger in which D’Souza gives his final thoughts to the “citizenship class” he’s been teaching to fulfill his community service.

“How do you know when you’ve become an American?  You’ll know when you’ve become a Republican.”

Verdict

Hillary’s America is not only the top-grossing documentary of 2016, it’s the 5th biggest documentary of all time.  There aren’t just some people who take this rat offal at face value.  There are millions of them.

Hillary’s America (2016) Drinking Game

Take a Drink: whenever Hillary shows up

Take a Drink: whenever D’Souza tries to argue all racists are Democrats

Take a Drink: for familiar Republican talking points

Take a Drink: whenever D’Souza enters a clearly fictional locale (the Democratic Party Museum? Prison?  Community service?)

Take a Drink: whenever Satan, I mean Saul Alinsky, shows up

Do a Shot: when you puke in your mouth a bit

About Henry J. Fromage

Movieboozer is a humor website and drinking games are intended for entertainment purposes only, please drink responsibly.

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