Child Eater (2017) Movie Review

By: Movie Snurb (Four Beers) –

Robert Bowery was a man who lived in the woods and ended up going blind. Robert believes that eating the eyes of children would make his eyesight return. 25 years after a little girl escaped his grasps with one eye intact, Robert’s back and he’s found his latest victim. Lucas is a young boy with an active imagination who lives with his dad in Robert’s old house. While Helen is babysitting Lucas at his house, Lucas goes missing. Did he run off or is Robert back to eat childrens’ eyes?

A Toast

For the small budget and the unknown cast, this film still pulls off a creepy tone. You can tell there is some real talent behind the camera. Considering this film is adapted from a short film, it is still able to aptly fill the 82 minute run time. With a larger budget and a bigger cast, Erlingur Thoroddsen could be a name to watch out for in the future of horror.

Beer Two

The acting was nothing to write home about. Granted it was an entirely no name cast, but I could tell the entire cast was acting. Nothing is more irritating then watching people act. Because usually the actor ends up overacting, which some of the actors do in this film. Mainly the police officers end up falling victim to this.  Helen, Lucas, and Robert pull off the most believable performances.

“NOT THE BEES!”

Beer Three

The writing at times is clunky. The dialogue isn’t fluid and thus the performances suffer. Some of the conversations don’t feel natural; it feels like they were tired of doing retakes and decided it was good enough. I can’t help but feel that this might’ve been better as a 40 to 50-minute movie. I hope someday I can watch the original short film this film is based on. I still think there is talent within the filmmaker Thoroddsen.

Beer Four

Though the film was creepy, most of the attempted scares fell flat. There were some jump scares that worked effectively, especially involving a bear trap. However, for a horror film involving a man who eats childrens’ eyes, the film wasn’t as terrifying as it could’ve been. Preying on children is a frightening premise to begin with; however this film fails to full take advantage of the film’s themes. Also, I shouldn’t hold this against the film, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the Rick and Morty Eyeholeman bit. Every time we see Robert all I could hear is “Gimme my eyeholes!” This definitely didn’t help not finding the film scary, but I couldn’t help it.

“Gimme my eyeholes!”

Verdict

Though Child Eater has some talent behind the camera, it still falls short of being a truly frightening film. Maybe Thorodddsen’s next film will be better. If you’re wanting a good horror film to see right now I suggest Get Out.

Child Eater (2017) Drinking Game

Take a Drink: every time someone has their eyes ripped out.

Take a Drink: every time someone yells “Lucas!”

Do a Shot: for every moment of overacting.

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