Top “Fill in the Blank” Articles

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: James Wan Caught Devilishly Banging Rebel Wilson In Pitch Perfect Lay!!


Tequila has kidnapped at least 65% of my pants and 100% of my dignity. But I digress. Welcome back to the eighty-second Felix-Ripjaw Debate where the snark gets snarkier, the ... Read More »

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: Vin Diesel Gets Furious And Departs After Playing With Doh!!


Everyone I know is getting engaged and I’m over here like “can I get a pizza topped with taco doughnuts?” Priorities, people. But I digress. Welcome back to the eighty-first ... Read More »

The Felix Felicis Guide To The .Gif Review: 5 Things About ‘It Follows’ That’ll Make You Go WTF?!


The world of Indie horror films is like a potluck where you don’t know who’s bringing what to the party. Sure, somebody might show up with a seven-layer-dip so good ... Read More »

Top 10 Simpsons Episodes Of All Time


By: Movie Snurb - Since FXX has been showing The Simpsons every week it has made me realize how much I love that show. I thought, “why not do a top ... Read More »

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: Michael Bay Builds Lego Prison To Trap A Tyrese Green With Envy!!


Either I just accidentally baptized my neighbor’s cat in vodka or there’s a midget rocking a parka in my front yard right now. But I digress. Welcome back to the ... Read More »

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: Dredd Sequel Caught Going Down Harder Than Tom Cruise On Faux Frank Martin!!


I’m almost positive karate was invented by women to deter wild penis attacks. If you’ve never seen a feral boner coming at you then you don’t even know. But I ... Read More »

An Interview: Writer/Director Jordan Rubin Drops By Our Pabst Pond To Talk Zombeavers!!

jordan rubin

Car horns honk. The sun shines. A light breeze dances across Jordan Rubin’s cheek, interrupting visions of zombie beavers chasing scantily clad co-eds though his dreams. He opens his eyes ... Read More »

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: Liam Neeson Found Trapped In Sue Storm’s Scorching Lady Maze!!


I like to start every Debate with words of wisdom, so when life gives you lemons, ride a zebra through some pound cake. I guarantee you life will be confused ... Read More »

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: Jack Huston Caught Red-Blue-And-Gold-Handed Having Sexy Adventure Time With Supergirl!!


I don’t need to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, I can do that comfortably from the couch at home with the added bonus of booze. But I digress. ... Read More »

The Felix-Ripjaw Debate: Indiana Bones 50 Shades At Will Smith’s Epic Hand Job Jamboree!!


At some point it would be great if we could evolve thumbs that would quit typing once our B.A.C hit triple digits… But then this column would never get written. ... Read More »